I know it's best to move on with things but my heart is hurting so badly. I was completely blindsided last night. Talk about never underestimating the unexpected.
Last night I found myself being drug from my bed by my BFF MD and made to get dressed. I hadn't eaten all day, I hadn't showered either. I was really quite a mess. Regardless, he made me leave the house and I ate mashed potatoes, veggie chili and some mushrooms with buffalo sauce. We went to Lucky Gator Loft to see the reunion of No Empathy which was really pretty cool. Of course, upon entering the show, I ran in to Nikki and her boyfriend Chris. Derek introduced us many months ago so seeing her was a painful reminded especially when she asked where my man was. I told her I wouldn't know since he broke up with me BY PHONE 3 hours earlier. The look of shock on her face was worth a picture. She was like, "Shut up!" "No way!" Yeah, I was equally as shocked. "But you're the only girl he's ever brought around and shown off." "When he looks at you, he lights up." Hearing those things almost brought me to tears so I asked her to stop talking. She gave me an Old Style and then I saw Matt Plate and Kenneth so I went over and said hey.
No Empathy was good. I haven't seen them since high school. I ended up getting sick to my stomach and asked Durso if we could leave. Without missing a beat he grabbed my shit and we were out the door. We got back to my place and I crawled into bed where I continued to cry some more. Durso is good at saying the right thing all the time. Not because he's "just saying it" either. He really knows how to talk to me. I appreciate having such an awesome friend in my life. He also reminded me of my past and how I really should get in touch with things that I enjoy such as horse back riding. Just 45 minutes from here are 3 horses that I am welcome to ride at any time. I need to get back in to riding. Horses really keep me sane. Fuck, I want to clean stalls at this point. Durso said he missed the days when I smelled of horse. I agreed with him. Me too, buddy, me too.
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