I've spent most of the afternoon sleeping. It is what I tend to do before I have to work a 10 hour overnight shift at the EC. Austin looks as if it is being blessed by the rain in late June. My dogs spent half the day shaking, panting and jumping on the bed as the thunder, lightening and heavy rains passed through. The forecast is saying we're looking at rain most of the week which is both good and not good. This weekend is my weekend off.
I'm missing a lot of my past. I often do. I think about it and think, "Hey, you could live that life again." Parts of it I want nothing to do with but there are so many things that are basic to me that I've really let go over the past several years. I'm mainly talking about Vespa scooters and horses. My green 100 Sport has been sitting still in the parking lot for about 10 months now. Since the purchase of my car and my healthy fear of riding in Austin, I've put the scooter on the back burner. I was recently talking to a friend back home who was telling me my old P200 is for sale. I know in my heart I should have never sold that scooter. I must find a way to purchase it back and sell the 100 Sport. Of course, Axl has his issues too but that was my, how do you say, "soul scooter." I'm cheesy and sentimental. I wear a cruciform around my neck from that scooter every day. I rarely ever take it off. It's a reminder of back home, good friends, late nights, ice cream sundaes and happiness.
Horses. Where do I begin? Let's just say my passion for them was once much, much greater than it is now. I used to be able to spend all day, every day at the barn with Stinky. Even when I had the carriage business, I enjoyed cleaning stalls and taking care of Tru, Leila and Phoenix. I don't know if the loss of the carriage business made me sour on horses or if it was the recent sale of my horse, Tru. She was my "soul horse." An amazing mare with personality more than some people I've met. I've recently made the decision to lease a horse. I'm not 100% sure which horse or if I'll even have to pay at all to ride but I need that discipline in my life again. I've always thought that horses really made me the woman I am today.
Horses helped shape me and taught me great responsibility. They also kept me away from boys and a lot of trouble in my teens. Granted, I was a sassy teen, I'm now a sassy adult. I question authority and do what I want when I want. I'll never say sorry for who I am. Anyways, back to horses. I need to start riding again. I need more physical activity. I do dance several nights a week at various places here in Austin and I'm on my feet a lot at work but I need a little more. I've never been one to exersise. I won't go to a gym but I'll ride a bike.
So that's where I'm at right now. While writing this blog my dad called with bad news. Looks like mom isn't do well after her procedure today. I don't have all the details but he sounds pretty upset. I don't know how much more I can take. This is one of those life tests I suppose. It sucks that airfare home this weekend is close to $800. Fuck.
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