New Leaves?

I sure have been a neglectful blogger lately. I guess the first thing I should say is Happy New Year! My life has been keeping me busy and part of it is a lack of drive to blog about life. Things are hard right now and I find I blog more when I'm upset or sad or just need to get words out of my head through my fingers and on to the computer.

Where do I start? I guess the biggest think on my brain right now is Stephen. Oh, Stephen. He is so perfect in so many ways but lacking in areas where I really need him sometimes. We have so much in common and really enjoy spending time together We laugh a lot and make all kinds of dumb jokes. There's a connection there for sure but currently there is a disconnection. Every month since we met, we've gone camping. I adore the outdoors and camping with him and the dogs is something I look forward to. I also enjoy variety (in many aspects of life). Last month it was so bloody cold and uncomfortable at night. I told him I don't want to camp this month. He's being push and rude about it and told me I can find comfort in pavement and orange street lamps. Yeah. A bit dramatic. Of course this disagreement has triggered other issues and we really aren't getting along right now. I guess I don't have much more to say about that. What I do know, however, is if we break up, I am NEVER falling for another human and will never be in a serious relationship ever again. Ugh.

Farah. It means "Joy" in Farsi. Farah came to the EAC two days before Christmas as a abandoned 6-7 week old puppy with two large wounds on her back. We joke that she fell out of Santa's sleigh and was run over. Not the funniest joke but if you knew our EAC crew, you'd get our humor. I didn't have the heart to send this baby to TLAC so I took her on as a foster. She actually was meant to be Stephen's foster but I've kept her with me mostly. I've come to realize he'd be a terrible father because when the puppy was crying in the Morning due to hunger, he wouldn't get up and take care of her. He made me do it when I was the one that needed to sleep because I had to work later that day. Anyways, Farah is doing well. She's healed up and has two speeds, dead asleep and balls to the wall crazy. Puppies are a pain in the ass but I do love them.

I'm so uncertain of so many things right now. I need to sit back and relax. I'm overnight at the EAC tonight so I should try to get some sleep. At least I got some of this shit off my chest.